10June09
Haix... wat to do?? Y cant my life be more simple, always ther r more things piling up. I cant breathe le, cant take it anymore... how to be happy, always finding for happiness but wat i get was sorrow n sadness. Family, money n studies...
I jus meet a new friend, shu zheng, she is quite a nice girl n on 8/6/09 i had lunch wit her at mos burger, n we talk alot bout studies n i agree wat she told me. I really wan to work hard but ther r always family problem tat cause me to worry n i cant concentrate. I really confuse, i don noe wat to do, i really wish to go far cos i wan my family to feel proud of me, i wan to set a gd example for my sis n bro. I hope tat at de end of it i can tell myself tat i have already did my best n tat is de maximun i can do n not regret for y i didnt work hard enough. I don wan to live wit regrets... My dad r not doing well ther n i have been owing sch fees for 6mths. Actually i really feel like give up n put a full stop. It is very tiring when no one in de family noe wat i am doing n wat i have done, no one understand, no one share my burden.
My uncle wan me to have a tution teacher but did he ever think whether can i afford to have even if i wan n i need. I don even noe how to ask my dad cos tution need money. I noe my results sux, but i am trying hard to do something bout it, i have already put mac aside n trying hard to look for someone to help me. I have already stop going out n have fun cos i will spent money n i need to study.
I am getting more n more afraid, i don wan to leave s'pore, can i ?? The situation r bad, things r getting complicated. I don wan to think but wat if it really happen... when i don have a choice to choose n my bright future r gone n vanish... how strong can i be.