12 april 09hellos...today is sunday... weekends always flies, i am sooo tired after 3 days of G. Eventhough i am tired but i really enjoy working. I enjoy working wit de ppl.. thanx a lot to jas n ws. Love ya!!It seem like nothing happened wit me n my dad, i really cant get use to it when he is here even my mum too. I have already get use to it.. life without dad n mum. My dad asked me y when he talk to me i don feel like talking, it is cos i don noe wat to talk to him n our relationship is like drifting apart. He asked me a lot of things but i only answer n nvr will continue de topic. All he noe is ask bout studies n money.. sick n tired to listen to de same things. I noe he care for me but i can only say tat i am sorry... life without u by my side for these 16yrs have already allow me to get use it n it is hard to return to de past cos it is time tat matter.Sometime i really feel tat i am living in tis world blindly.. i don noe wat i wan n really feel lost. Studies make me headache.. i don feel like giving up watever i have now but i am struggling to hold on to it tightly cos if i jus let it lose a bit.. it will be gone. When i am really feel so down.. i have to cry at a corner with no one knowing n no help at all.. no one to comfort me, encourage me. Maybe she is right.. i nvr allow others to step into my world, i have been keeping things to myself. Jus hope tat no one will be worry but i didnt noe tat things will turn worst when i cant do anything to it... At de end,i blame myself for my failure, i cause everything. Tears jus flow naturally n sliently.... I still have to stay strong in front of others.. i am not weak from de outside but i am,inside. Y is this happening to me, it is really pain inside. After all... i still have to depend on myself to continue de thousand miles journey even i keep falling. Life continues.......Lastly thanx JASTINA for de help today, really apprecite it :)